Saturday, February 1, 2014

Days of Love

February... the month of LOVE

The Lovers card
The card of passion and romance
New or rekindled relationships
The exchange of breath
Of warmth.
Unspoken intimacy

Februray is a reminder to be special to the ones we love.

Sunday, December 8, 2013

Dear Dairy tomorrow I get my hair cut

Dear Diary,

Tomorrow I get my hair cut. And I'm nervous about it.  I even canceled once and I'm not gonna lie, I was relieved.  Until my son pointed out how 'shiny' my roots were.  (but I rock that shiny shiz!) (no? I probably don't)

Diary, you know how I feel about my hair. I am emotionally attached to my hair (which is physically attached to my head).  Do you remember when it all fell out?  That was so scary. Do you remember when my beloved helped me cut it short? And when I sat in the front yard and rubbed the remaining bits off my head and into the grass? There was so much. It was everywhere and the wind was catching it and carrying it off.  My dearest told me not to worry, the birds will use it to warm up their nests.  It was very cold out.  It was just before Christmas.

All through that winter I wrapped my head.  In scarves, hats, and little knitted beanies gifted from people near and dear to me.  It wasn't so bad at first but as time went on I felt awkward.  Remember the fake bangs I bought? Those were cool!  And then the wig?  Wasn't that a laugh? It was hot and uncomfy to wear and often ended up in the strangest places, like the top of the hubs head! I proudly rocked my bare head but secretly I was sad.  You know, Diary, that no one gives a thought to a bald man but when you see a bald woman, well, you know something is terribly wrong.  And it didn't help that the steroids puffed me up so much that I didn't recognize myself in the mirror!

I think one of the most challenging part of this was when my eyelashes and eyebrows fell out.  Elf to the rescue with eyebrow pencils and those little stencils to help you draw a 'perfect' eyebrow!  Yes, I could draw in a perfect eyebrow but sometimes that eyebrow was a little low, giving me a menacing scowl.  Or maybe a little high, with a look that says inquisitive? Surprised?  I could set the tone of my day by the placement of my brows!

A lot of women draw in their brows so that was ok but the lashes! Mercy mercy me! Diary wasn't the eyelashes my crazy place?  Since I'm not much of a makeup girl I ran out and bought some mascara.  Do you know how many different types of mascara there are??? Hundreds! I hurried home with 5 tubes of the stuff and they all worked fine until I could count my lashes.  Not even the best mascara can turn 2 lashes into 10.  After crying to my bestie she hand delivered several packages of falsies and a tube of glue.  Remember how excited I was?  I WOULD HAVE LASHES AGAIN!!! Oh and we had so many styles and spent the whole day sizing and trimming and trying them on until my eyes were positively raw!  She made all look so easy!  It's not easy Diary, no, not at all.  And so every day I would spend hours (ok, maybe not hours, but, yes, maybe it was hours) trying to get the lashes in the right place.  Too high and there's a wicked flesh line making you look like you have 2 freakish strips of eyelashes. If the lashes are to close to the nose you can feel the edges poke each time you blink.  That gets annoying in a hurry.  USE GLUE SPARINGLY! else you may find your eyelids gluing together in unusual ways.  There were days when I thought they were on perfectly only to find the lashes had 'traveled' or popped up at one end or the other. In order to avoid repeating this lengthy process each morning I tried to sleep in them.  Diary, let me tell you, this is not recommended! At the very least the lashes will crease in an unnatural way.  However it was amusing to find lashes attached to my beloved. 'Look honey! you really do have eyes in the back of your head!' I called it quits when I caught the furbaby eating my lashes!  Time for a new tactic.

Eyeliner! Yes, eyeliner will be my salvation! I'll just draw in a lash line!  So I only have 7 eyelashes, no problem, I still have a dark line outlining my eyes! Right? WRONG! You makeupnista's know how tricky eyeliner can be and I've watched hundreds of Youtube's on this.  What a chemo patient understands is that sweating out chemicals is part of the deal.  This healing process will ensure that your eyeliner will end up under your eyebrow and a host of other unwanted places.


 But I digress.  This is really about the hair on my head right?

So Diary dearest, I shall conclude for today.  I'll write more later.



Thursday, December 5, 2013

The long and the short of it

I have been growing out my hair for about 6 years now.
She asks me why, I'm just a hairy guy
I'm hairy noon and night, hair that's a fright
I'm hairy high and low, don't ask me why, I don't know
And now it is time
It's not for lack of bread, like the Greatful Dead, darlin'
Give me a head with hair, long beautiful hair
For a hair cut!
Shining, gleaming, streaming, flaxen, waxen
Give me down to there, hair, shoulder length or longer
(I know, messy girl, this is at the end of our Thanksgiving evening)
Here baby, there, momma, everywhere, daddy, daddy
And I'm nervous about it.
Hair, flow it, show it
It's not that I haven’t' worn my hair short
Long as God can grow it, my hair
Most of my adult life my hair has been short. Like really really short.
Let it fly in the breeze and get caught in the trees
Give a home to the fleas
A home for fleas, a hive for the buzzing bees
And I've so enjoyed having my hair super long
A nest for birds, there ain't no words
For the beauty, splendor, the wonder of my hair
But now, now it is time to take it up a notch
Flow it, show it
Long as God can grow, my hair

I think
I want long, straight, curly, fuzzy, snaggy, shaggy, ratty, matty
Oily, greasy, fleecy, shining, gleaming, streaming, flaxen, waxen
Because I'm starting to feel a little like Rapunzel right about now.
Knotted, polka dotted, twisted, beaded, braided
Powered, flowered and confettied
Bangled, tangled, spangled and spahettied
And if you find a hair in your soup, don't pull to hard.
Oh say, can you see my eyes if you can
Then my hair's too short
It's most likely still attached to my head. 
Long as God can grow it my HAIR!!!

I believe Hair was written by Galt MacDermot for the musical of the same name. 

Sunday, November 24, 2013

Thankful for me me..

I do not want to hear Christmas Carols.  I do not want to see Christmas commercials (except for the one where Santa is running in slo-mo to Target with his hair all flowing) and I don't want to walk into ANY store bombarded by Christmas glitz and glitter.  Until after Thanksgiving.

I want to enjoy each season, individually, in order, as they come.

Is this to much to ask????

Each holiday and season brings with it expectations and a certain amount of emotional and physical work. Like, cooking a ginormous turkey and all the fixins for 20 people.  It's enough to think them through one at a time.  November is my thankful month.  The month I focus on those wonderful people in my life that I am thankful for. And a time for the entire family to get together, catch up on all the gossip and just nurture those family bonds. 

I've been reading a lot these days about self-compassion and how we care more for others than we do for ourselves.  Women are much more prone to this. As mommies and nurturers we are always getting drinks and wiping spills.  Making sure dinner is ready and baths are hot.  It's just in us to care for the comfort of those we love. 

BUT sometimes we just gotta say, 'What about meeee???'

Even if you are fortunate enough to live with a nurturer you still gotta learn how to be compassionate to yourself.  It's more than just taking time to soak in a bubbly tub with a good book and a hot cup of tea.   Oh that's good too! Yes, do that! But I'm talking about taking this a little deeper.  I'm talking about being nice to yourself, forgiving yourself and well, being thankful for YOU!

This month I shall focus on being thankful for me.  For me! 

What about me would Tarot say I should be thankful for this week?

What about me am I thankful for?
What are those things about me that good?
What are those things about me that are not so good?

What about me am I thankful for?
The energy card is The Star, follow your dreams, magical solutions, heavenly illumination.
I am thankful for the path that I am following.  A mystical magical path. A safe place for me to grow and learn.

Affirmation: I am following my dreams.  I seek and understand magical solutions. I receive illumination from heavenly places.

What are those things about me that good?
The Ace of Swords! New ideas, new thoughts.
I have many great ideas.  They come in bucketful's at times.  I don't know what to do with them all. 

Affirmation:  I have many ideas. I create from these ideas. I have many new thoughts.  I use these thoughts to help myself and those around me.

What are those things about me that are not so good?
Temperance.  Ah, what is that! Temperance is good, is good! I sometimes am not patient with others. I get OCD on arts/craft projects.  I am not always a good listener.

Affirmation: I am patient with others.  I have balance between family/work/art. I focus on the task at hand.  I am compassionate and listen to others.

What about you are you thankful for?


Friday, October 25, 2013

Halloweenie Reading for Beverly

Being a deck hoarder collector I have a number of Halloween inspired Tarot and Lenormand decks.  They are perfect for the holiday but don't get much use otherwise.  Shame really as they are ga ga gorgeous!  In order to exercise them a bit I've decided to offer a few Halloweenie readings this month.

Beverly has an upcoming business idea and wants to know if it's a go or should she wait awhile.

I'm using the Deviant Moon Tarot by Patrick Valenza.  This is a uber creepy deck with lots of unusual creatures and images.  Reads much like a traditional Rider Waite deck with a bit of a twist.  I find it accurate and fun.  I love these images and I'm looking forward to the other decks he has up his sleeve. muahaha....

Ok Beverly, we got the Tower smack dab in the middle! Oh nos! You see, The Tower is never a good card for me.  Utter destruction, people falling off the tower, shiz is on fire.  Well, it's all bad.  And that, dear friend is the energy of this project.  Wow!

So what now? Glad you asked.  On the left we have the SUN! YAY! And the Knight of Pentacles is rockin, but in the wrong direction.  7 of Swords, well he's eatin up all the swords.  So while I think this is a great idea with a lot of hope and potential, you need to change the direction some. 

Is there any hope for this project in the future?  Yes I say YES! Right down the middle the Sun needs to pass through the fire (Tower) to get to the Ace of Swords.  So something new is coming.  It could be an addition to the idea that is just what is needed to move forward.  Something is going to cause a change.  You may think your idea has been dashed to pieces.  It hasn't really.  Things needed to be shaken up a bit in order for you to focus on what is really going to work.  The Hanged Man (one of my  most favorite cards.) tells me you need to look from new eyes.  You know how you can't figure out something and you turn it upside down and around and all of a sudden you SEE it?  Looking at the thing with a different perspective.  Look and figure all angles and see if something shows itself.  The Queen of Cups is heading toward the knight.  She's going to bring all that fantastic energy back to the project and get him moving in the right direction.

Advice: For a timing card I got The Magician.  I don't use Majors for timing, this tells me there is some work left to do before you can resume this project.  You have all the tools, you have everything you need to complete and be successful here.  This project needs more research or needs reworking.  I'm also getting that you should enlist the help of some trusted friends to help you 'see' what needs to be worked. Maybe there is some new tool that will help you work through the problem. 

Thank you for allowing me to read for you.  I hope this has been helpful.  If you have any questions please let me know.  I'd be happy to answer them if I can.


Do you like the Deviant Moon Tarot? This is truly a unique deck and super fun to use during the Halloween season.  You can get yours delivered before Halloween!  Check it out!

Halloweenie Reading for Brenda

Being a deck hoarder collector I have a number of Halloween inspired Tarot and Lenormand decks.  They are perfect for the holiday but don't get much use otherwise.  Shame really as they are ga ga gorgeous!  In order to exercise them a bit I've decided to offer a few Halloweenie readings this month. 

Brenda would like to know if her mother will/should move up here.

I'm using the Halloween Tarot here.  Such a cute deck with imps and bats, pumpkins and ghosts.  This is a very user friendly, Rider Waite clone.  Easy and accurate.  You can pick up a deck for yourself, I've provided the links below.

I pulled 7 cards, energy in the middle, Brenda on the left and mum on the right.
So I see that Brenda is very worried about her mom.  I do see a move coming up. I see that mom is going through a tough time.  The Tower is always about catastrophic events.  She's a strong woman and it looks as if she is riding this storm pretty well.  Still I think she may need to be closer to her family.  The King of Pumpkins tells me that the hubs (or father figure, dad?) is a concern.  Is the hubs or dad in favor of the move?  I'm not seeing conflict.  I think it most likely will be a good move for everyone. 

I'm a yes on the move.  Mom is in need of assistance.  You are worried and need her as much as she needs you.  I think it will be a good move.

I'm not real sure on the timing issue.  I'm getting the 3rd week of July.  That's a long way away so I'm not too sure about that. 


You can get a copy of this charming deck on Amazon. 

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Halloweenie Reading for Teresa

Being a deck hoarder collector I have a number of Halloween inspired Tarot and Lenormand decks.  They are perfect for the holiday but don't get much use otherwise.  Shame really as they are ga ga gorgeous!  In order to exercise them a bit I've decided to offer a few Halloweenie readings this month.

Teresa has asked 'How can I bring more courage and fire (passion) into my life?'

I've used the All Hallows Tarot by Robin Tisch-Hollister.  This is a very readable Rider Waite clone.  There is all sorts of spiritual and divination images in these cards.  There's even a Happy Squirrel card!!! Truly a fun deck and perfect for any gathering of ghouls. 
I've pulled 3 cards.

Justice   Death   3 of Cups.
How cute is that? So I ask you, what needs to die, what is getting in the way in order for you to have courage and passion? See that last card? Joy! Celebration! What's in the way? Justice, Death. Justice, fairness, truth. What is going on that is not fair? These are Majors baby, you've got some heavy hitting things going on that are going to take some doing in order to remove them. Think on those lines. Fairness, justice, truth. If you could think of one thing, the biggest thing keeping you stuck, what would it be? THAT is the thing that needs to be removed before you can move forward. This is tough stuff sistah. I pulled a timing card and it looks like the 2nd week in March. You will start to see some movement, progress about that time. Don't be discouraged. This is big and will be some hard work involved. It wont happen overnight so you just gotta keep chipping away at it.


you can download the All Hallows PDF file here.

I think this deck can still be purchased here.